Halloween 2012-2013

I am a crazy festive holiday person...for every holiday..thanks mom! So thankful now I have a kid(even though he is just a baby still) to help me not look as crazy! Halloween has a special place in our heart b/c is gave us fun/joy during a difficult time last year and I must say it is a HIT with Noah. He was sooo happy last night!! He could have stayed up until 1am if we would have let him! He just loved looking at everyone walking around in the dark and playing with his cousins.

I helped Noah walk up to the first house, knock, say "trick or treat" and put a piece of candy in his bucket. Then the next two houses Noah did it on his own! He was so excited!! He would knock(more like a quite tap) on the door, smile when they opened it and wait until they told him to get a piece and then he would reach his tiny little hand to grab one and put it in his bucket. Of course he said thank you and bye bye to each house. haha seriously this kid is a sweet heart breaker.

He would get back in his hay wagon and "inspect" his candy in his bucket by pulling or dumping what was inside then put the bucket on his head. Then Emma would get him out for another trick or treat, we would hand him his bucket and he would freak out with excitement. (Now I hope he does not think its fun now to go to up to everyone home). We shall see.

 This kid will always be the life of the party:

His cousins Emma and Jackson came over just like they did last year. It is real special to have them here and I know Noah loves being with them so much especially on Halloween. My future sister-in-law Hannah and Sean came to walk around with us(they are getting married in 1-week!).

 Where's Jackson?!

Random side note: Did you know sonic has 50 cent large corn dogs on Halloween? Yep we got like 14 of those suckers.

Noah's pumpkin this year: (baby yeast paint)

 Noah's first pumpkin:

Special Halloween treats made for his class:

We took advantage of the Halloween Clearance today. Yes I took him in his pj's! It was early!

Halloween costume fail: (maybe next year?haha)

Noah on his first Halloween: No real trick or treating but he did treat everyone with his sweet face all bundled up in his money bag as we walked him around. It allowed him to stay nice and warm on a cold Halloween.

My sweet angel: 

Noah's Cleft Lip Surgery

I can't believe it has been a year today since Noah had his cleft lip surgery. I still find myself looking back at photos of him before surgery wishing to spend one more day with that face. 

The morning of his cleft lip surgery: I remember sitting here thinking, "This will be the last moments at home with this face that I love so much!"

I will never forget that feeling when they handed me my "new" baby boy. I had so many ideas of what I thought I might feel and think when they handed him to me. Really, I just was anxiously awaiting to see what he would look like, praising God for the ability to help him. What happened I did not expect. As I held my son after a few long hours of him in surgery...I cried hard. I was sad. I remember people asking me "What's wrong?" and that "he was ok." I shook my head yes, I knew he was fine but....I wanted my baby back! I WANTED the Noah with the tilted nose and the wide smile. I fell in love with THAT baby God sent me. I spent time letting the enemy win wishing Noah was not born with a cleft and waiting until the day he was "fixed". In the process, I fell madly in love with the face he had. I fell in love with the face that held his first smile, first laugh and first cry. I fell in love with the kisses that wide smile gave. He became my vision of perfect and now as he was "perfectly" in my arms, I wanted the beauty I had all along. 

The wonderful thing that I find in this is that the way I felt for Noah then, is the way God feels for us all. He has the love a parent has when he holds his children. He does not see through a worldly lends how beautiful his children are. He sees through his own and we are perfectly created in his sight no matter what form we are in.

I love that I can be bare, without makeup, hair a mess and tattered baggy clothes as I spend my daily prayer and devotion time with him and for him to think me more beautiful in that moment than at any other time. What he finds beautiful is love. And so explains why I missed that wide smile of his. When I was down and out, Noahs smile would radiate love and I found nothing more beautiful in the world than that. 

Noah's First (wide) Smile:

It is one of many things over the past year that Noah has taught me about our God, the creator of every living thing.  He finds beauty within me... I find my identity in Him. He loves me like I love my son. He loves my son as I love him. How can I ever doubt his goodness? His provision? His strength? 

Outside time with daddy at the hospital:

God provided these wonderful souls at Children's Healthcare for us. They are amazing and talented people! I am grateful how well they took care of my son.

Noah spent 3 days in the Hospital for this surgery and recovered quickly. I am thankful to have been there during a festive part of the year...Halloween. We decorated Noah's room with Halloween stuff. I remember he would stare at his fiber optic pumpkin forever oblivious to the pain.

The letter I typed for the doctor from Noah's Lippy the Lion book.

For these two reasons and for the wonderful children we encountered over the year...I wanted to start giving back. So a new tradition in our family is going to be gathering fun Halloween supplies to Children's to donate on the day of Noah's first surgery, October 16th. I just want to rest knowing that children in pain who have to stay in the hospital during Halloween can look around in their room and feel the festivities all around them and most importantly the LOVE that unties us all. 

Our first donation drop off:

Our Many "Recovery Walks". I thinking being outside made him feel better. 

Noah had to wear arm braces for a few weeks after both surgeries:

First "New" Smile after Surgery: 

Noah this past weekend.Enjoying this season in a much different way.

I have grown to love this smile a whole lot too!